Just a Thought

[NARCISSUS]

A second ago i was perusing, TSB and I had came across the bit dealing with love and hate.
From glancing at the title it's needless to say that it opened the floodgates, it provoked some inspiration.
It also prompted me to ask this query, from my examination of the things the title had brought to mind.
So, i'm curious to know the answers you lot will give to this question. In preface, that particular part of TSB talks about loving strongly those who deserve your love, which is construed to be parents and other family members for the most part. Now, for the question. Looking specificly at parents, when you class them as loved ones is that out of a feeling of obligation and duty, feeling you own them something just because they brought you into this world? Why would you feel you have a familial duty/obligation just because they were contributors in your being here? After all the reason(s) they even had you in the first place is 1. it was the consequence of them wanting to get laid. 2. They were striving for the american dream of 2.3 kids, the white picket fence etc. 3. they wanted to fill a need for emotional fulfillment, in a particular instance since after the previous kids all were grown and moved out doing their own thing. In any event your birth in this world was based on a selfish desire on the part of the parents, so, why the feeling of obligation and duty?

[Mister_Six]

The ONLY people there for me when I went to prison were my parents. Almost all of my friends flaked, my family was the only people left for me. If you had any idea what I put my parents through you would wonder why they still even talk to me. I owe them my life, and nothing short of it. My parents are all I have, because I can't count on anyone else. This is why blood is thicker than water for me.

[NARCISSUS]

Hmmm, a fair enough answer that is.

[Serpentine]

I was an "oops", an accident, and at the time I was not wanted. My parents opted to keep me rather than choosing the alternatives. Their own sense of responsibility is the reason I'm here today and the reason I am who I have become. They did not have to raise me, nor love me. They chose to, as I have chosen to continue to love them, and care for them in their current conditions. My obligation and sense of duty comes from being responsible. I could just as easily leave them to fend for themselves, make them push through the pain of everyday living, and believe me, since my father's back surgery, everyday is an ordeal for him. I chose to come home for two reasons, the first being they asked me to. The second because it benefits me today. We give something to one another in exchange for the things we need at the moment. There is also love, admiration, and respect thrown in to seal the deal. Responsiblility to the responsible! They drained me of nothing, only encouraged me to be the very best at everything I did. In my eyes they are not ingrates, therefore they are worthy of my affections.

[Queen]

Well there was no selfishnes on my parents side, hell my mom told me i was not planned..and my real father is sitting his dumbass in jail for 40 years..so there is no love that that sorry son of a bitch gets :D

My mother on the other hand has been through hell and high water for me to survive and thrive and come into my own..so loving her is not out of duty..loving her is out of all she has done for me..all she has let me do..and for all she has identified for me..besides when your mother is a bi witch and so are you ..you tend to have alot more thuings in common than you would with any other parent...

My grandparents and my mother and stepdad..and 1 cousin all get my love..the rest of the family screw them :D

[Whippet]

I dont have that with my parents but i have it with my fat headed "aunt" ' she's not my aunt by the way but she is my dads sister.She lives here with my gran and she's nothing but a complete loser.She's 39 years old , hangs around with a 19 year old , drinks nearly every night of the week , she is a total mummy's girl and a total grassing bastard-always getting me into trouble.

I dont feel i own her whatsoever but i feel i owe my gran for allowing me to live here.I dont cause any trouble in the house ' she grasses for shit - like if she didnt like the way i spoke to her or something like that.Somehow i used to feel as if i liked her but now i see that i am living with the biggest disgrace of humanity.

[NARCISSUS]

Wow, why is she always grassing you out? Next time you see her just say, hi hater. lol

btw, i just now realised the typo. I meant owe, not own. sthilly me.

[Leo-Gonzo Satanist]

Because FOR THE MOST part, your parents loved you before you were capable of knowing love. They provided for you, fed you, cleaned you, clothed you, rocked you to sleep at night many times at cost of their "good night's rest", held you when you were afraid and or crying, sacraficed the best years of their lives doing all this for you, and sometimes to a fault,loved you UNCONDTIONALLY. That's why.

[Leo-Gonzo Satanist]

Geezus Chloe! Sometimes music is more than the notes on the page. You don't have to strip everything to the sub atomic level. Every now and again, let a rose be a rose. Sounds like you need a night out again.

[NARCISSUS]

The only love that can be termed unconditional, is the love one has for oneself. Self love(narcissism) is the truest, purest and most unconditional love there is.

[NARCISSUS]

Actually, lots of people have that problem of placing conditions on themselves, to paraphrase what you had said it boils down to perspective, a person has to see themselves as being worthy of a self love that has no conditions attached. It's about seeing yourself as perfect, even in your "imperfection".

[Ana, Daughter of Lilith]

Duty-that's such a strong word. Am I a 'dutiful daughter'? Well, perhaps not; not always. :-) Do I love my parents? Yes, I do, though there were points in my teens that I was convinced that I hated them. I don't know if they strived for the 'English Dream' (!) in having me-I'm their only child-but they have given me every possible advantage in life, the best of everything, including the best schools. Yes, I love them, not out of a sense of duty, not because I feel I ought to, not because I am returning an obligation; I love them simply for being the people they are (and for buying me a horse!!!)

[NARCISSUS]

The English Dream, is their such a thing?